More often than before, I am thinking how cold it is. Summer, July, never have I felt such cold, not even with -30. Cold, that is in the bones, I feel like they are rotting. Drinking tea all day. Normal summer morning should begin with "what dress should I wear today", even if I have to wear a jacket with it and tights, even with umbrella. Here: "which jumper should I wear, that woolly one or the other one". We complained at work that it is cold, can we have the air conditioning off, only to be told it is summer.
When I want to have a Saturday of rest, what can I do? Go hiking? No, the places are flooded, people are rescues even from houses, don't want to have this with tent. Today could have gone to local hills (1h train), but there was no train.
Going to salsa, thinking beforehand: it is raining, cold, would it not be better to just stay at home? I went at the end, was laughing about something.
During the lesson, somebody told me: "You have muscles???" I said "Not more than normal". Then he said: "Yes you do" and showed where. Just too funny after the previous rain comments, I have not been hiking a lot this summer and these muscles are the walking pole muscles (I have a tendency to push more with walking poles than from legs:D)
I neeeeed hiking! Rain, go away!
Sunday, 15 July 2012
Wednesday, 4 April 2012
city or small town
In my hometown in Estonia, when there is a concert, I should go! Because it is a rare event!
In Birmingham, when I feel I want to go to a concert, I just have to look some websites and it is quite likely I can find a suitable one! Only problem is, I don't know who to invite with me, I don't want to go with somebody who does not like this music, but someone who would equally happily go alone. So I go alone. Too many times have I invited someone to cinema to see a good film they did not like (K :)). Or to an exhibition. I almost invited H to a photo exhibition a few weeks ago, luckily she started telling me about a bad experience when she went to an exhibition last time. I did not know anything about the topics of the one I wanted to go to (it was a group of local photographers), so maybe better she did not come!
In Birmingham, when I feel I want to go to a concert, I just have to look some websites and it is quite likely I can find a suitable one! Only problem is, I don't know who to invite with me, I don't want to go with somebody who does not like this music, but someone who would equally happily go alone. So I go alone. Too many times have I invited someone to cinema to see a good film they did not like (K :)). Or to an exhibition. I almost invited H to a photo exhibition a few weeks ago, luckily she started telling me about a bad experience when she went to an exhibition last time. I did not know anything about the topics of the one I wanted to go to (it was a group of local photographers), so maybe better she did not come!
weather!
I had a sticker on my mirror "buy strong sunscreen!", so today I bought one. It was very warm last week, 17 degrees or more and sunny, so I thought the summer is near. Although I enjoying the blue sky through lab window, now when I am back to computer work, I cannot even have lunch outside, it was snowing today and so strong wind that I wished I had worn hat and gloves!
At least I will not be questioned by my Sri Lankan colleague who think that if I sit in the sun (whilst eating lunch) for half and hour, I will be like her. No, I will never be like her, I will be more like a lobster.
I keep singing songs that I should sing on Sunday.....but they are in my head!
One Easter Sunday, in 2008, of course I woke up late, late so that I could not walk to church, I had to cycle, because I always cycled when it was not snowing. But then the ground was covered in snow!
At least I will not be questioned by my Sri Lankan colleague who think that if I sit in the sun (whilst eating lunch) for half and hour, I will be like her. No, I will never be like her, I will be more like a lobster.
I keep singing songs that I should sing on Sunday.....but they are in my head!
One Easter Sunday, in 2008, of course I woke up late, late so that I could not walk to church, I had to cycle, because I always cycled when it was not snowing. But then the ground was covered in snow!
Friday, 30 March 2012
Do you need help?
Again! I don't know what to do when I don't really need help, but people want to help! I have tried not to refuse, or some people might get upset. But it is difficult, if someone asks and I don't need help, I would say it!
Today I was doing some work and my colleague (a man) asked if I need help carrying a 20 litre water container (so, 20kg, normal luggage weight). I said "No, thank you, I carry it 3 times a week". Later, when lifting it to a table, he tried to help again. Unfortunately, I thought it is easier for me to carry on than to put the container back to where it was. Very often I do this work with another colleague who normally lifts it and hopefully not because he think I cannot!
Last week, I was taking the mess after my experiment (a trolley full of baskets of flasks and other things) to the autoclave room when someone asked whether I need help. Automatically I said "no", afterall, it was all on a trolley! Yes, I had to open doors, but i normally manage on my own. I realised and let him open the doors for a while (until the room where he had to go).
Why am I writing this? because a few years ago, we came from camping and I had lent a sleeping bag to a friend. So coming back, I had to carry 2 (mine fit into the bag, another, I just had in hand). Coming down some stairs in town (not a difficult terrain!), another friend offered to carry the sleeping bag. I said "no". He got upset and started behaving strange. We had a chat a few weeks later and he said he did not think that he think I cannot carry it, just that he wanted to help.
Sometimes when I walk with the camera, people offer to carry it. Why would I want to give my camera to somebody? OK, even if I am not taking pictures....if I took it with me, I guess I knew that I can carry it! It is not about trust, J has borrowed it during some walks and taken pictures.
I think I will let people help me if they want, just because they want to help, but when they start suggesting I cannot carry a 20kg container, meaning that I cannot do my job.... I will go back to my Nordic independence.
By the way, thanks for the person who helped transfer my little daphnids today and tried to help with water tank. Thanks for the person who I normally work with for treating me as equal. Thanks for the person who opened doors for me last week!
Sorry to anybody who wanted to help but i said I don't need help!
Today I was doing some work and my colleague (a man) asked if I need help carrying a 20 litre water container (so, 20kg, normal luggage weight). I said "No, thank you, I carry it 3 times a week". Later, when lifting it to a table, he tried to help again. Unfortunately, I thought it is easier for me to carry on than to put the container back to where it was. Very often I do this work with another colleague who normally lifts it and hopefully not because he think I cannot!
Last week, I was taking the mess after my experiment (a trolley full of baskets of flasks and other things) to the autoclave room when someone asked whether I need help. Automatically I said "no", afterall, it was all on a trolley! Yes, I had to open doors, but i normally manage on my own. I realised and let him open the doors for a while (until the room where he had to go).
Why am I writing this? because a few years ago, we came from camping and I had lent a sleeping bag to a friend. So coming back, I had to carry 2 (mine fit into the bag, another, I just had in hand). Coming down some stairs in town (not a difficult terrain!), another friend offered to carry the sleeping bag. I said "no". He got upset and started behaving strange. We had a chat a few weeks later and he said he did not think that he think I cannot carry it, just that he wanted to help.
Sometimes when I walk with the camera, people offer to carry it. Why would I want to give my camera to somebody? OK, even if I am not taking pictures....if I took it with me, I guess I knew that I can carry it! It is not about trust, J has borrowed it during some walks and taken pictures.
I think I will let people help me if they want, just because they want to help, but when they start suggesting I cannot carry a 20kg container, meaning that I cannot do my job.... I will go back to my Nordic independence.
By the way, thanks for the person who helped transfer my little daphnids today and tried to help with water tank. Thanks for the person who I normally work with for treating me as equal. Thanks for the person who opened doors for me last week!
Sorry to anybody who wanted to help but i said I don't need help!
Thursday, 23 February 2012
too tired for what?
A few weeks ago I cancelled a hike because I thought I was too tired to lead (well, I did not exactly invite anybody, just some people assumed that they can come with me). But in the evening, I was fine for 5 hours of salsa.
Last week I was ill, very high fever, but there was salsa ball on Sat. On Friday I had to go to work for a bit because somebody else was ill and I had to change my little babies. So, I told E that on Saturday I will not go to salsa workshops to dance, will go and take pictures instead and will only dance in the evening. Arriving at uni, of course I went to 5 workshops and then dancing in the evening until 2 when the security thought it was enough dancing. Playing flute on Sunday, surprisingly enjoyed it despite the lack of bass guitar (and because the sound people came late or I don't know what, I know the microphone was on, but I felt I was a bit too loud. Or maybe not.
Today, Thursday, I was going to go to salsa again, but coming home, chat with P and E, I decided I am too tired to go to the city centre (plus I have to be at uni super early tomorrow). So I can play the flute.....or......make a cake for the independence day tomorrow. Of course the most complicated cake I know. So here am I sitting, cake in the oven, still many things to do, having not played the flute yet (and it is getting late!).
At least the cake will be good! Happy independence day!
Last week I was ill, very high fever, but there was salsa ball on Sat. On Friday I had to go to work for a bit because somebody else was ill and I had to change my little babies. So, I told E that on Saturday I will not go to salsa workshops to dance, will go and take pictures instead and will only dance in the evening. Arriving at uni, of course I went to 5 workshops and then dancing in the evening until 2 when the security thought it was enough dancing. Playing flute on Sunday, surprisingly enjoyed it despite the lack of bass guitar (and because the sound people came late or I don't know what, I know the microphone was on, but I felt I was a bit too loud. Or maybe not.
Today, Thursday, I was going to go to salsa again, but coming home, chat with P and E, I decided I am too tired to go to the city centre (plus I have to be at uni super early tomorrow). So I can play the flute.....or......make a cake for the independence day tomorrow. Of course the most complicated cake I know. So here am I sitting, cake in the oven, still many things to do, having not played the flute yet (and it is getting late!).
At least the cake will be good! Happy independence day!
Sunday, 12 February 2012
salsa day
Woke up thinking about linear algebra and missing my last year mathematician housemate. A bit of daydreaming or doing I don't know what, messing around in R in my computer and "organising stuff", some washing, a useless trip to city centre, it was time for salsa! In Selly Oak. I have not worn heels a while, I normally dance in flats at uni, because the floor is quite dirty and the leather soles go shiny and slippery too fast. So today my feet are really tired, really really tired! There was cha-cha lesson at 8 and then salsa at 9 and then dancing until 1.
In town I saw somebody. Or they saw me. I was reading the advertisement of the exhibition at the art gallery and really looking up and somebody was really convinced they know me and said "hi". I turned around and it was split second, a bit late, because it was cold and they were wrapped in worm clothes, I only saw a smile. Yes I know this smile, but cannot connect it with a person. This us what happens if I am caught in thought.
4 people want to see the house tomorrow. I don't like.....me and E want to stay here, but if we decide, we need to sign contract for the whole house and we were hoping nobody is coming to see it. I hope they don't like it.
In town I saw somebody. Or they saw me. I was reading the advertisement of the exhibition at the art gallery and really looking up and somebody was really convinced they know me and said "hi". I turned around and it was split second, a bit late, because it was cold and they were wrapped in worm clothes, I only saw a smile. Yes I know this smile, but cannot connect it with a person. This us what happens if I am caught in thought.
4 people want to see the house tomorrow. I don't like.....me and E want to stay here, but if we decide, we need to sign contract for the whole house and we were hoping nobody is coming to see it. I hope they don't like it.
Friday, 10 February 2012
good start and end to a day!
And bad between.
This morning started with an email, asking me to feed hundreds of small babies, after transferring them over. :D they are cute.
Now I got email asking whether I would like to play in a cool place....with other people of course....in a special prayer! Yes! This will be the most special place I have ever played!
And during the day, I felt bad....to explain how bad, I was going to go hiking tomorrow, but knew already yesterday I am not going, feel too weak for that (maybe not for the hike, but managing other people who will be cold/afraid/tired. Good I had not organised anything yet....some were just hoping they could come with me! well, actually, I feel like doing some work....and was feeling bad, how can I prefer work to hike, but I really feel I could use a saturday to do something useful. Oh, tomorrow is the farmers' market, my favourite, reminding me again the great cheese, the good cheese I cannot have, sadly. I think it's the best food ever. I sometimes have cravings for chocolate, sometimes for salad, but mostly, I would like to eat cheese. I cannot, I know, but it is sooooo good! But there are exception days (and, Estonian cheese is OK, as are some other Europeans....why England?) I think the cows are too unhappy here.
Playing flute....as quietly as possible, because I think E is a bit ill. What times are acceptable to play? I have recently developed a habit of going to work late because I have to play, if only one song, because nobody is home then! so good!
This morning started with an email, asking me to feed hundreds of small babies, after transferring them over. :D they are cute.
Now I got email asking whether I would like to play in a cool place....with other people of course....in a special prayer! Yes! This will be the most special place I have ever played!
And during the day, I felt bad....to explain how bad, I was going to go hiking tomorrow, but knew already yesterday I am not going, feel too weak for that (maybe not for the hike, but managing other people who will be cold/afraid/tired. Good I had not organised anything yet....some were just hoping they could come with me! well, actually, I feel like doing some work....and was feeling bad, how can I prefer work to hike, but I really feel I could use a saturday to do something useful. Oh, tomorrow is the farmers' market, my favourite, reminding me again the great cheese, the good cheese I cannot have, sadly. I think it's the best food ever. I sometimes have cravings for chocolate, sometimes for salad, but mostly, I would like to eat cheese. I cannot, I know, but it is sooooo good! But there are exception days (and, Estonian cheese is OK, as are some other Europeans....why England?) I think the cows are too unhappy here.
Playing flute....as quietly as possible, because I think E is a bit ill. What times are acceptable to play? I have recently developed a habit of going to work late because I have to play, if only one song, because nobody is home then! so good!
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